1. Eating together around the same table.
2. Praying together.
3. Celebrating together.

Take stock of how much you do these three in your family, in your church community, and with your friends. Then find ways to increase that in the next six months and see whether you are living more gently.

• Stop biking on the sidewalk – that’s the most dangerous place to cycle!
• Why are you biking the wrong way down a one-way street? (Although I do this on occasion myself) And why are you doing that at night without any lights on your bike?

To drivers:

• It is safer for everyone if you signal your turn!
• Don’t honk your horn to let me know you are there. I can hear your vehicle from quite far away and your horn is incredibly loud. (All drivers should test their horn by having their kid honk it while they stand in front of the hood. Use horns sparingly around cyclists!)
• Please don’t cut off bikes – you could be delayed by just 10 seconds and go behind me, especially if you’re passing me and then slowing down to turn.

To people:

• Please stop wasting all that water washing your sidewalk / driveway!

God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
[ selah ]
There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.
(Psalm 46 verses 1-5)

In the past, natural disasters were unexplainable and very beyond the control of people. Many were associated with the whims of fickle gods and minor deities.

If I were to write that Psalm today, I think I’d write it like this:

God is my safety net
always present in my need
I will not worry though my life is upset
and the complex world economy falters
Though employment supports run out
and insurance companies withhold their payments
[ pause to feel the force of these ]
There is peace that flows to make my heart glad
coming from the Creator God of the universe
This peace is for me, and is within me
He is my provider every day.

• take responsibility for your own safety
• don’t allow yourself to get upset about drivers as you’ll lose concentration on your safety
• summer construction means I get to pass cars frequently
• find the right path to your destination by trying many (right path = least stop signs + least busy streets)
• rain is only a deterrent (plus I need fenders!)
• there are lots more people biking and more cyclists means it will become normalized and safer
• designated bike lanes are very beneficial; interconnected ones without gaps need to be the goal (dreaming about Amsterdam)
• biking to work is so wonderful, I’m very thankful!

One point came out that was very striking: advertisers want you to really believe that buying products that are discounted will save you money.

The reality: you save money when you do not buy something.

Let me say it again: when you choose not to buy something, that is when you save money.

So, when a commercial tells you differently, think about what it is really saying. If you were intending to buy a product already, and now it is on sale, then you might save money in that instance. But if it is something you were not considering before, then you are not saving money by buying it just because it is on sale.

A corollary: Special diet food. You don’t lose weight by eating food (even special low fat food). You lose weight by not eating food.

Let the myth busting commence!

• communicate to build relationships, and
• know your own expectations, and know the expectations of others.

Conflict will inevitably result if we fail to continue to work on these.

The alternative to doing this hard work is to pull back from relationships. I think that is what a lot of North American society has done. We live in our own houses, make our own decisions without consulting others, and can break off relationships when ever we want – divorce, friends, club membership, churches.

And yet, I hear that people wish they had more friends or that they were closer with the friends and acquaintances they do have.

We need to learn how to communicate through and in conflict, and to be able to talk about our expectations.

To do this, I think we need the values encouraged in the Bible:

• commitment to something beyond ourselves – God and his plan for history, awareness that happens through relationships,
• understanding that we mess up and make mistakes, and we need help to change – concepts of sin and salvation, and
• believe that relationships can be restored – forgiveness received by God can be then extended to others.

The reward? Conflict won’t fester into feuds. Unconditional commitment means others will support me when life gets tough. Being known and accepted by others for who we are. Ability to work with others towards a better future.

I think that’s worth the hard work.

Well meaning people may say: “God’s in control. It’ll all work out.” or “Don’t worry, God will provide.”

Those promises are true, but the optimism of Western culture has imbued a meaning to them which may not be what was intended. Which therefore, when reality is found to work out differently, can lead to a real crisis of faith.

Christians have suffered starvation during famines in Africa. God did not provide food for them. Genocide in Kosovo meant that it didn’t all work out for many Christians there.

Why then do we in North America optimistically tell each other it’s going to be okay?

Many people are finding out it’s not okay and it may never be okay. So what might the promises truly mean? What is really solid at the centre?

Not having a good job or even any job, or enough food or a roof over our heads. Not having health and care when we are ill. Not having things get better instead of getting worse.

Maybe good happen to some, but that doesn’t mean they happen because God kept his promise specifically to them.

What we can count on: God’s love and that he will never abandon us. Evidences of beauty and life in even darkness and pain. His presence will give us strength. Everything will be made right, but only fully on the other side of eternity. God is still in control of the big picture.

Everything that we find good beyond these are truly blessings – to be cherished and enjoyed and celebrated. But let us be careful not to add to the promises of God more than what is really there.

…

Am I way off? Speaking out of my own pain that which I know not? Help me to understand. Tell me your story.

Maybe it’s thrilling because it’s something outside of ourselves, something bigger than just me. Think about what it is like for a refugee who has fled horror to come to the safety of Canada, and is now making their citizenship vow. Or maybe it’s like a doctor, after so many years of schooling, to take the Hippocratic oath.

When we do this sincerely and commit ourselves to keeping that vow, even when our emotions make us reconsider, and we keep at it until all other avenues are explored, that is an amazing, wonderful thing!

At the beginning of the Christian story, God makes a promise, a vow, that he’ll fix things, even though it was us that started making the mess. In the end it cost him the death of his son. Jesus wanted there to be another way, a way out, but in the end he kept his end of the bargain.

I think the keeping of promises / vows / commitments are such opportunities for hope.

On Earth… the problem had been with cars. The disadvantages involved in pulling lots of black sticky slime from out of the ground where it had been safely hidden out of harm’s way, turning it into tar to cover the land with, smoke to fill the air with and pouring the rest into the sea, all seemed to outweigh the advantages of being able to get more quickly from one place to another – particularly when the place you arrived at had probably become, as a result of this, very similar to the place you had left, i.e. covered with tar, full of smoke and short of fish. (from The Restaurant at the End of the Universe)

Satire and humour sometimes get to the absurdity of our life in a way regular speech often can’t. And, it can help us step back a minute and think about what we’re really doing with our actions and decisions.

Because reading articles about the problems with the sealants we put down on our driveways (Environmental News Network, and US Geological Service) doesn’t always have the same shock factor nor encourages us to change our actions, like:

1. Drive less and use / encourage alternative types of transportation (transit, walking, bike lanes / paths, trains, etc)
2. Put in a different driveway – gravel, interlock, grass / interlock or ‘grassy pavers‘ and the like
3. Support restriction of harmful chemicals – like coal tar and the like

We’re always going to need to travel and move around. But maybe we can think about doing it only as much as needed, not doing it needlessly, and doing it in the least destructive way possible.

One day, a truck pulls up with stones for the cement. A local worker begins to shovel it out, one shovelful at a time, while the truck driver sits in his cab. A couple of the North American men jump up on the truck to help the ‘poor’ guy.

The driver jumps out of the truck and is very angry.

The entire truck is not meant to be emptied. Each shovelful was being counted and would be charged for. That count is now disrupted.

Very rarely does acting first and listening later actually produce a better result. How many times do we need to watch and experience that the most important thing is to listen first?

No one feels good when someone comes at you with an “I know what your problem is and I’m going to help you fix it, or fix it for you.”

I read a book called “When Helping Hurts” which looks at this deeper and more clearly than I’ve seen laid out before. Read the book or at least look at this visual book summary (when_helping_hurts2).

Because trying to help could actually end up hurting someone, it is critical we think deeper. Just trying to help isn’t enough.