Crystal Clear

While watching the Olympics (which was a community affair at the house of one member who graciously purchased extra sports channels, made available her wide screen TV, and supplied watchers with copious amounts of tea and other drinks – she’s the best!) and being inundated with high priced (and often effective) commercials, there was often much discussion.

One point came out that was very striking: advertisers want you to really believe that buying products that are discounted will save you money.

The reality: you save money when you do not buy something.

Let me say it again: when you choose not to buy something, that is when you save money.

So, when a commercial tells you differently, think about what it is really saying. If you were intending to buy a product already, and now it is on sale, then you might save money in that instance. But if it is something you were not considering before, then you are not saving money by buying it just because it is on sale.

A corollary: Special diet food. You don’t lose weight by eating food (even special low fat food). You lose weight by not eating food.

Let the myth busting commence!

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Living in community isn’t a walk in the park. Whether you’ve been at it 2 years or 50 years, it is still critical to

• communicate to build relationships, and
• know your own expectations, and know the expectations of others.

Conflict will inevitably result if we fail to continue to work on these.

The alternative to doing this hard work is to pull back from relationships. I think that is what a lot of North American society has done. We live in our own houses, make our own decisions without consulting others, and can break off relationships when ever we want – divorce, friends, club membership, churches.

And yet, I hear that people wish they had more friends or that they were closer with the friends and acquaintances they do have.

We need to learn how to communicate through and in conflict, and to be able to talk about our expectations.

To do this, I think we need the values encouraged in the Bible:

• commitment to something beyond ourselves – God and his plan for history, awareness that happens through relationships,
• understanding that we mess up and make mistakes, and we need help to change – concepts of sin and salvation, and
• believe that relationships can be restored – forgiveness received by God can be then extended to others.

The reward? Conflict won’t fester into feuds. Unconditional commitment means others will support me when life gets tough. Being known and accepted by others for who we are. Ability to work with others towards a better future.

I think that’s worth the hard work.

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